The idea of being able to rewind certain moments in our lives, like the honeymoon, the day my children were born, Disney World vacation, steam train ride through St Petersburg and College. Wouldn’t it be amazing just to press a button so we could keep going back to the highs and fast forward past the lows.
Life is often referred to as a journey and as we travel along the unpaved roads we grow in experience and wisdom. I would like to rather think of life as a tape recorder, where we should rewind moments by going back to the times that captured our hearts and made us feel alive. Just like parts of the tape we listened to in school, that love mix our high school sweetheart created for us in 8th grade rewound so many times the tape became stretched.
I couldn’t remember the first restaurant that my wife and I had our first date at, but I did remember the song played in the background, I made dinner for two this evening and Depeche Mode “Somebody” played on the Ipod.
In every relationship there are special moments, moments that only two people who love each other would understand, a glance, footsie on the couch, a soft word blown in the ear while shaving. A connection that can only be explained as special, but we sometimes share too much with other people outside of our relationships which leads to influences who where not there when you met nor the first night you kissed, who don’t understand the feeling you felt the first time your eyes locked. Our friends should never be allowed to navigate our ship they should be there to support and listen.
Don’t erode that special connection between you and your partner, if your relationships trust has been eroded and other people are over staying their welcome, then stop and change, take a time out. I have found that on a few occasions my wife and I have just needed a weekend away to regenerate, to get away from all the static noise and sometimes to remember what we first saw in each other.
“Relationships dont always make sense. Especially from the outside”
― Sarah Dessen, Along for the Ride
I sat outside last night, we got the deck chairs and downloaded star walk and there dad and kids sat gazing at the universe.
The first thing to remember is you going to get somethings wrong, the key to being a good parent is simple ,love your children, understand that they going to be disappointed but be there to hold them, listen when they don’t speak and pay attention when they do, cry together, laugh with your belly , wear a funny hat to dinner and sympathise as if you were 14 again.
Life is not easy for kids who are constantly bombarded by adult content, we ask them to understand divorce or moving house, changing schools to accomodate a parents job, but how times do we ask them how they feel ?
We need to cherish the gifts God has given us, take a walk, discuss the stars, play a game of catch, water the plants, choose a song to buy.
One of the most fascinating aspects of our lives is we work to provide for our kids and in return we never get to know our kids because of work. I sometimes feel like the song “We are running”
The funny thing about traffic jams, is they tend to be the great leveller in life, for no matter what type of car you drive, or how much you earn we are all in it together, and going to go through the same experience of stop start until the impasse. They also tend to bring out a persons true personality we get the impatient, angry and layback and then there is the majority the “us”, the poor sods who accept their fate in life, we sit in our cars worry about being late, how our teenage kids are doing in school, how to resolve the monday morning argument you had with your spouse over finance, the people who dont jump the queues, the moms and dads who save coupons and live for seventy odd years only to have a one liner chiselled onto our grave stones. “Here lies _____ they lived an unfulfilled life, month to month.”
It’s time to look around and squeeze a little more juice out of the lemon you’ve been given, book a holiday, save some money, take your children on a fishing trip, book a cruise with the family. First start the day by climbing out of bed on the other side. Make a conscious decision to change your life by first changing the small things, start by throwing away the bland coffee cup you take to work, buy some new shirts, get a haircut. Then begin to plan the larger changes, cut out some images of a new house, car, exotic holiday place them on your desktop and start to build your dream by investing in yourself.
Open a secret bank account, sell all the crap you have collected that collects dust and eBay it . Let you grave site rather say “Here lies _____ they died on a beach in the Maldives”
If you ever sat in a traffic jam and wondered that there has to be something more you’re right!
What does our partner see in us ? Using the bathroom scale and looking in the mirror is always a great reality check. The other day I watched a show with a guy who had changed his life through weight loss suplements and had made millions through mail orders not to mention the get rich quick schemes that investors stand to make 40% return on their money. CRAP all of it. We get old and if you have kids you get poor, stressed and overweight all at the same time.
I am sick to death of these quick fix programs from weight loss to financial freedom, not to mention the get rich bastards who prey on the desperate and vulnerable. I’ve decided that no goal is achieved without hard work, you have to walk and workout, save money to make money, but slowly and patiently.
Life is about quality, happiness and what ever you consider you need to be in your confort zone is what you need to achieve. The other day all I needed was some fish wrapped in newspaper and soft chips and sitting on the beach with my family. God could have taken me then. The lesson I think is one coffin does not fit all, when you get to the end of your life which just might be today how would you have lived today differently .